It was Mariah’s worst choice—and the best decision.

As open adoptions go, it’s a dream scenario. But that doesn’t make saying goodbye any easier. From the hit true storytelling podcast RISK! comes a beautiful and heart-aching memoir of a mother’s love.

Mariah MacCarthy was a financially strapped playwright in Queens with two roommates. Nothing about that situation said Let’s add a baby to this. Nine months later, having Leo adopted by two gay dads was the most loving solution possible. All Mariah fears now is becoming a stranger. But as four lives are irrevocably changed, Mariah discovers that embracing the moment of farewell is just the beginning of a family story, by turns joyous and devastating.